Ok girls lets get into some real discussion.
1. What do you want sex to be?
2. What is it really like for you?
3. What ways are you disappointed?
We all know that a song can bring you back to the moment you first heard it. How about a familiar smell? We have all had Deja-vu moments when we think of something from the past.
Now imagine you are having sex with your husband when a thought comes in your mind..... It could be a thought of past loves, it could be a thought from a book you just read, it could be something you watched on TV, or it could be from the last time you had sex with your husband.
Not only now are you completely in your own little world but you are creating expectations for this sexual encounter with your husband.
The battle begins here......what are you thinking about when you are having sex?
My battle....
Before I was married, I had sex with close to 16 guys. I know the Bible tells you not to do this but at the time I wanted love and I thought my body was the way to get it. Lets not get into the reasons I thought I was not loved. My actions produced a consequence, a consequence the Bible and God tried to spare me from. The consequence of remembering my past and trying to not put certain expectations on my husband. How about you are you woman who brings these encounters into your marriage bed?
I also loved to read romance novels. I loved how the maiden was swept off her feet by prince charming. Do you bring these encounters into your marriage bed?
I was exposed to the addictive pull of porn by one of those before marriage sexual encounters. I wanted every sexual encounter to be more and more exciting. More and more toys, more experimentation..... The thing is that it is never enough. Do you bring this into your marriage bed?
Sex with your husband cannot be based on expectation. When you are having sex and thinking about something else it has no hope of being the gift God has for you. You have to be fully there.
Is this easy? No.
-------------------------------------------------------------
We will get more into this discussion later but here is your homework....
1. Create a list: What are your expectations for your husband
2. Now write next to those where you got that expectation
Bible verses: Yes, you do have to memorize it.
1 corth. 13:4. Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Do you really want to change anything? If so ask your husband the above questions. Talk about it. Work together on this bible study... Remember the memory verse and don't forget to pray about it before talking to your husband.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Your quiet time.....
1. Apologize to God for things you bring into the marriage bed.
2. Ask him to help you find ways to focus on your husband during sex.
No comments:
Post a Comment